Halloween Kills movie poster
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Halloween Kills
Halloween Kills movie poster

Halloween Kills Movie Review

Now available on Blu-ray and DVD (Buy on Amazon)

Spectacular in all the wrong ways, Halloween Kills is a bloody disaster, a horribly edited and nearly incomprehensible horror film that is like a car wreck you can’t look away from. Despite being from the same filmmakers as the 2018 hit--a movie I loved--Halloween Kills will go down as one of the worst mainstream horror films in recent memory.

Picking up moments after the last film--the confusingly titled Halloween, which serves as a direct sequel to the original Halloween--Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) is on the way to the hospital with her daughter (Judy Greer) and granddaughter (Andi Matichak) while Michael Myers is busy escaping his inferno trap and laying waste to the firefighters who unexpectedly arrive to rescue anyone inside.

Such a continuation should lead to “more of the same,” and “more of the same” of director David Gordon Green’sfirst  take on Michael Myers would have been welcomed. But almost instantly, something feels off about Halloween Kills. The opening feels awkward, amateurly made, and poorly edited. There is no sense of buildup or suspense; it just cuts straight to the point in a way that is neither satisfying nor gripping.

The rest of the movie isn’t any better. It’s a chaotic mess, lurching from one batch of disconnected characters to the next with little sense of real connection or forward momentum. Laurie Strode remains glued to a hospital bed much of the film, the tough-as-nails woman from the previous film gone. Her relations, who you would expect to take an even more prominent role in this round, and relegated to supporting characters in lieu of a cast of poorly written newcomers ranging from Tommy Doyle (Anthony Michael Hall) to a weird gay couple who refer to each other as Little John and Big John (Michael McDonald and Scott MacArthur). 

Absolutely every new character sucks. Aside from, maybe, married couple Marcus and Vanessa (Michael Smallwood and Carmela McNeal).

The horror is nonexistent, though Green would argue by pointing into the extremely high death count. Sadly, he never establishes the staging or methodical suspense he captured in the previous Halloween, nor what you’d expect from any Michael Myers film, good or bad. This time around, Myers kills openly, swiftly, and en masse. It’s not as much fun as it sounds.

And Halloween Kills never gets better. By the end, your head will likely be singing with a chorus of “what the fuck did I just watch?” It’s a shocking decline given the same talent involved,  a bloody orgy that amazingly feels as if the knife never finds meat. It truly is spectacular in all the wrong ways.

Review by Erik Samdahl unless otherwise indicated.

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